Banned for not feeding me... my appetite is healthier than most, so where's my 10 course dinner and smorgasboard of desserts for after?

Oh, and NO brussel sprouts.

Banned for the beggars banquet didn't cater for dessert lovers... and the rolling stones gathered no moss [or groupies on this latest tour]

Oh, and banned cos tight pants are like St Pauls Cathedral... no ballroom.

As Mick Jagger discovered when he took Jerry Hall dancing in the shadows.

Banned for crotchless pants, the new comfortable, breathable, answer to home comfort.   maybe

Banned for crotchless pants are not for everyone.    All depends on ones needs.  

Banned for not recognizing the French expression for.  "Uh Huh Huh"

Banned for driving the wrong way down a one way street.... and when the cop told you it was a one way street, you told him: "That's okay, I was only going one way."

Banned for seriously, hope you're doing OK and that no one was hurt.    

Banned for sticking out your rear end out so far to begin with... and how is mooning on the motorway legal anyhow?

I saw a big fat ass sticking out of a car I was passing once.  At first I thought somebody was mooning, but as I drew closer I could see it was my local politician smiling out of the window at everyone... yup, you guessed it... was just before election time.

Banned for one cannot miss that much ugly in life without keeping one's eyes closed... and then yer miss tha boobies.

banned for existing on the face of this earth

Banned for thinking fugly.

Banned for making me wonder what he'd do with a donkey or related species.